Catholic Charities Doesn’t Discriminate, Hates Equally

What next, cats and dogs exchanging currency? Stop the insanity!

I really hate Facebook applications, and I particularly hate all those “sassy” bumper stickers people are posting with sayings like “I don’t discriminate, I hate everyone equally!” I realize I am a misanthropic jerk, but I still think those are stupid. However, if Catholic Charities of Washington, DC has a Facebook page, they should probably update it with that sticker.

As of today, gay marriage is legal in the District. Hooray! Victories! Right? Right?

WRONG. Because gay marriage is just, like, SO SCARY, Catholic Charities has decided to no longer provide benefits coverage to spouses of newly wed employees. Coincidentally, that policy starts today.

Huh. Couldn’t possibly be related, right?

No. Of course not. After all, Christianity is all about loving thy neighbor, helping, and forgiving. Why in the hell would a Catholic charity organization refuse health care to EVERY new spouse, simply on the small chance that there might be some gender congruence in the couplings? That just wouldn’t make any damn sense.

I still just don’t understand what’s so terrifying about gay marriage anyways. Is it that, given the opportunity, they think women would rather marry other women because men are so utterly unappealing? Is it because if two men marry each other, we will bump into the confusing issue of who will do the dishes and fold the laundry and make the sammiches? That if gay men start making their own sammiches, women might start expecting their heterosexual husbands to make their own goddamn sammiches too?

The foundations of my entire reality, they quake and shiver at such a thought. When will the madness end?!

I’m super-thrilled that DC has also approved same sex marriage. Every time we carve out another victory, that’s, well, another victory. Never mind the fact that we shouldn’t have to be fighting for this in the first place–it should be self fucking evident that who you love doesn’t change that you are a human being. Marriage may have started as religious institution, but in the glorious US of A where we have this neato thing called “freedom of religion” and “separation of church and state,” marriage has morphed into a social institution. Unless it can return to being strictly religious–IE carrying no tax benefits, no hospital visitation rights, no special perks except a big thumbs up and a show of the pearly whites from your deity–then it must remain strictly social and it must be equal. This should not be a question. There should be no debate. It shouldn’t be a matter of celebration that on one more itty-bitty little piece of American soil, people are “allowed” to be full citizens of the country.

Fuck that noise.

And fuck you, Catholic Charities, for punishing the many for the sins of none. A victory has been won today that never should have had to be fought for and you have turned around and in response to love, you have institutionalized hate. Every time I get off because I’m thinking about a woman, I’m dedicating my orgasm to you and I’m sending Jesus a memo. He’ll be keeping track, just for you.

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03/03/2010. Tags: , , , . Uncategorized.

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