Yes, Our Flight Attendants Are Why the Economy is Tanking.

Before I start this post, full disclosure: my dad is an airline pilot and my stepmom is a flight attendant. I’m not entirely unbiased here.

Anyways, apparently when a Spanish airline went bankrupt, they owed their flight attendants something along the lines of 8 or 9 months of wages. In order to protest this, the flight attendants are posing naked for a calendar.

I don’t have a problem with the posing naked, but I DO want to know… How exactly is this protesting the unpaid wages? How is this solving the problem?

Then I made the mistake of scrolling through the comments. I really, really ought to know better.

Why is it that foreign airlines have pretty young flight attendants, while American stewardesses are mainly dried-up old bags?

Oh, I dunno. They probably get sapped of their will to live due to having to spend their lives making $18k a year at best while dealing with jackasses like you. I hear that can be terribly dehydrating.

The responses to that inquiry were equally precious:

Because American Airlines have to face our overly PC and litigious culture, and have forgotten what stewardesses are there for.

Call me old fashioned, but I thought flight attendants were there to serve you food, bring you blankets, and keep you safe during the flight. I was unaware that in fact they are supposed to be airborne sex-delivery systems. Someone should probably inform the airlines that those weeks of training that they make flight attendants attend every year and all those certifications that they’re expected to keep current are actually completely irrelevant because they have nothing to do with a flight attendant’s REAL PURPOSE. Of course. What value can safety and professionalism have when there are penises in this world that aren’t receiving flying blowjobs at this very second?

Our country is in crisis, clearly.

yes, FOREIGN stewardesses are way younger and hotter.

what’s wrong w/ U.S? this is why our economy is not growing.

Oh but of course. Never mind the fact that these foxy young foreign flight attendants are protesting because THEIR AIRLINE WENT BANKRUPT.

Pfft. Details. The point is, they’re out there and naked. If American flight attendants would hurry up and get young, slim, and naked, all our economic woes would be solved!

The problems with the airline industry couldn’t possibly have anything to do with the ridiculous restrictions that keep being placed on the airlines that continue to drive costs higher and higher (coupled with an increase in the cost of fuel and provisions), the absurd TSA song and dance you have to do to take even the shortest domestic flight, or the fact that the majority of the American public doesn’t think of air travel as safe so they don’t utilize it. Yes, none of these things could possibly contribute to the low rates of air travel, which in turn drives the tickets even higher than they’ve already been inflated due to all the other outside circumstances.

All of that is completely beside the point.

The problem is that our flight attendants are insufficiently sexy.

Yep. That’s definitely it.

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04/02/2010. Tags: . Uncategorized.

3 Comments

  1. Holly replied:

    The saddest part about “what [flight attendants] are there for” is that these guys DON’T expect flying blowjobs–just decoration. Having a nice woman around is like having a nice picture on the wall, it just classes the place up, you know?

    Bad enough that women should bust our asses not eating and buying the best clothes and fret over the hair and makeup just to get a man–this is what we’re supposed to do just to be in the background. To not even get a man, just to be deemed acceptable for set dressing. Shit.

    I always have to remember not to conflate the men who post inflammatory comments on the Internet with the men in the actual real world, though.

  2. Pete replied:

    Most North American female flight attendants are snobby conceded bitches. Fly a foreign carrier, like Singapore Airlines, and you will know how real women treat their passengers. North American flight attendants seem bothered that you are there, where international flight attendants seem eager to want to serve you.

    • Cuppy van der Cake replied:

      I agree that customer service is an important part of any industry, but especially for things like airlines. However, I’m not talking about customer service, I’m talking about appearance. The two are not the same.

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